


Blood On My Name

by Cperea_ovo84



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-20
Updated: 2016-01-11
Packaged: 2018-04-16 05:53:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4613649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cperea_ovo84/pseuds/Cperea_ovo84
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The nightmares came each night and each night they ended the same...she still left, she didn't look back...she was still gone...<br/>Blood remained on his hands and that's when he realized, he bared it so she didn't have to...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. part i

**Author's Note:**

> first published writing bare with me! thank you so much for reading!!!

“Bellamy Blake, look at me!” Octavia shouted as Bellamy attempted to stalk away from his younger half. “Leave me alone Octavia.” He growled, his strong demeanor normally made anyone in his wake cower away but not Octavia no matter how much he wished for it at times. “Bellamy!” the sibling yelled making a few bystanders turn and look. Bellamy huffed turning around and walking up to Octavia. 

“Tent, now.” He ordered, Octavia thankfully obliged and followed him. 

“What?” he growled, “It has been months Bell, months since she left, you can’t keep wondering into the woods everyday for hours on end without telling anyone, then coming back once the sun sets. I get you’re trying to distract herself but working yourself to death just to try and forget about her absence is not the way!” Octavia snapped trying to keep eye contact with him. “Clarke left and she’s not coming back!” Octavia hissed. 

Finally Bellamy’s head shot up as he looked at his sister with hurt eyes, “I do what I have to Octavia, what do you want me moping and doing nothing while she’s-” Bellamy paused, “While she’s gone.”

“She needed time to heal Octavia.”

“And what did we need? We’re all damaged Bellamy but she ran away from her mistakes! She has blood on her hands that she cannot wash off!” Octavia growled.  
“She didn’t do it alone Octavia! We all have blood on our hands stop blaming Clarke!” Bellamy hissed making his sister gasp. That was the first time in what felt like forever that he used her name he winced making it seem that her name itself burned his tongue. 

“Now if you’ll excuse me Kane is waiting for me to go over the next hunting party.” Bellamy said calmly as he walked past his sister to the crisp fall air. 

***

Night came faster then Bellamy would’ve liked but nonetheless he knew he had to make his way back to camp. He sighed dropping the piece of scrap metal and walking over to his gun and jacket. Bellamy puffed out a sigh and began walking before a snap of twigs caught his attention and he quickly turned aiming his gun up.

“Whoa calm down big guy.”

“Damn it Raven I could’ve shot you.” Bellamy growled looking as Raven limped over to him. 

“Thankfully you didn’t.” 

After a pregnant pause Raven looked around, “Octavia is catching on and asking questions, there’s only so much I can hide before she decides to follow you out here one day.” Raven stated. 

“It's clearly not that hard.”

Bellamy sighed turning around, “Octavia.” Before he could go on she stopped him, “Don't start with me Bell, what are you doing here at the Drop Ship?” Octavia asked it looked different to her but she still had no idea why he would be out here. 

“I've been fixing it up.” He admits “The Ark, Camp Jaha, has never been our home and I felt as if I fixed it up we could come back we could have our own camp all of us and she-” Bellamy stopped hoping Octavia would fully catch the last part. “And she'd come back.” Octavia finished making Bellamy look back at the Drop Ship. 

“Bellamy...” Octavia sighed. 

“What do you want me to say Octavia? That she never mattered? To forget that she left? I can't Octavia because if it wasn't for her I wouldn't have been able to keep us alive. Everyone puts the blame on her saying she should've done things differently but she tried Octavia she tried doing everything she could to save the 48, Our people. We all have blood on our hands Octavia! We've made our choices and I would've made the same as her!” He growled turning on his heel to head back to Camp Jaha. 

“Say her name Bellamy.” Raven spoke up making Octavia look at her and making Bellamy stop in his tracks. “Say her name.” She demanded once again. 

Bellamy's back tensed as he looked down, bodies of fried grounders no longer cluttered the ground he got rid of them as best as he could, he had spent nearly everyday for the past two months here cleaning and rebuilding. For a few hours everyday he made sure no one asked where he was the only people that ever knew were Raven, Wick and Kane, now though? Now he knew Octavia was going to be even harder on him or want to tag along but how could he let her? This was his safe place, this was his time to be alone and not think about being apart of the council, worrying about his sister, his people. And most importantly this was when he was able to forget about her. Or only think about her. The way her lips felt on his cheek as they said their goodbye's.  
With another deep breath Bellamy looked up and continued walking ignoring Raven and his sisters calls. 

Bellamy knew he couldn't do it. He knew his wounds ran too deep to the point were her name just her simple name was like salt in his wounds it ached. He would never admit it out loud though. He wouldn't.


	2. part ii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She made him forget about things for the most part like everyone else she was there while he healed, he knew he wasn’t complete with her but he was as close to it as he was going to get without Clarke.

Bellamy turned just enough to feel Lincoln’s heavy boot connect to his chest sending him to the ground. Groaning Bellamy coughed as Lincoln stood over him, “You’re leaving yourself wide open after that final hit.” He informs. “Just can’t seem to focus.” Bellamy responded finally standing up.  
“I know Octavia told me, come on we need to work on your technique.” Lincoln order taking off his shirt and standing in front of Bellamy as they got into stance and took a deep breath. Over the past few months one of the main halls in the arch station was made for training and everyday Lincoln taught Bellamy more and more of how to defend himself. Despite the times where Bellamy felt like Lincoln was purely just kicking his ass on purpose he still dragged himself there every day no matter how bad his muscles protested. And over the course of these three months he’s improved or so Lincoln has told him.  
“Give it all you got.” Lincoln demanded.

Bellamy nodded, mentally thanking the man for not asking about what had happened the day before, lunging forward as Lincoln began blocking. Before he could react Bellamy landed a solid punch on his right shoulder causing Lincoln to stumble back. “Good.” Lincoln said as Bellamy helped him up. “Not many people get to beat up their sister’s boyfriend and get away with it.” Bellamy chuckled as he lunged forward again landing a few punches.   
Lincoln quickly turned around as Bellamy launched his first forward Lincoln grabbed his arm quickly spinning around, pushing his body up and pulling him forward flipping Bellamy straight onto his back, Lincoln quickly pulled his arm back, still gripping Bellamy’s right wrist, and lunged forward stopping a few inches from his face.   
Letting go Bellamy sighed laying on his back, “And not many boyfriends get to beat up their girlfriend’s brother.” He said smiling slightly at Bellamy. 

Bellamy groaned and nodded taking Lincoln’s hand and standing up.   
“Things are so different now.” Lincoln says taking a drink of water, “no longer needing to run or fight.”

“Let’s see how long that lasts.” Bellamy replied slipping on his shirt.

Glancing over he sees Lincoln with a stone faced expression. “This is our home now Lincoln, we fought for it.” Bellamy says making Lincoln look him in the eyes, but before he could respond there was a knock near the entrance of the training room. Both men glanced over to see a girl leaning on the wall. “Kane needs you Bellamy.” She said smiling as bellamy chuckled putting on his jacket and walking over to her then turned to Lincoln, “See you at dinner.” He said walking away with the girl. 

“Bye Lincoln.” she said. “Gena.” He responded nodding his head.

“I figured I’d find you here.” Gena said as they walked down the halls, “Everyday, same time, I already know I’m going to be sore tomorrow.” Bellamy responded. “Maybe if you didn’t let him kick your ass…”  
“Ha Ha very funny.” Bellamy says as they turn near the Council room door. “Where are you heading?” he asks, “Back with raven, Kane and Abby were down at the yard earlier and were looking for you I told them I knew where you’d be so they sent me to retrieve you.”  
Bellamy laughs and shakes his head. “Well thank you then.”  
“Are we meeting up later?” Gena asks.

Bellamy pauses pretending to think even though he knew the answer, “I would but Miller and I are on perimeter duty tonight.” Bellamy says sighing. “Hey its okay I’ll just see you at dinner.” Gena says smiling slightly. “Of course, see you.” He says kissing her cheek, Gena smiled and sighed shaking her head and walking back to the yard looking for Raven.

Bellamy had met her a month after the mountain and Clarke, they began as friends and now well now she is his girlfriend ma that be the proper term? Who knew? She made him forget about things for the most part like everyone else she was there while he healed, he knew he wasn’t complete with her but he was as close to it as he was going to get without Clarke. Time seemed to drag by so slow, no one ever talked about her and despite the time that past despite the accomplishments of Camp Jaha he still felt as empty as the day she left.  
Taking a deep breath Bellamy looked around and nodded at the guards as he entered the Council room. Stopping in his tracks he looked to see the all too familiar Grounder. 

“Indra.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know it has been a LONG time since uploading and i apologize but with college then the holidays and work i was so busy but i will be uploading more since i do have some free time now. thank you all for reading i truly appreciate it. -C.


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